Clean Slate

Hey cuties! Excited to share something NEW we will be doing along with Color of the Month this year! In addition to continuing to feature a color each month, I invite you to also join with me as together we “try on” tackling a specific area of our personal lives. To this end, I am debuting “FOCUS” — a theme-based personal growth plan.

Each month “FOCUS” will cover everything from self-love to financial planning, and everything in between. Let’s work together to focus on some of the things in our lives that we can’t see on the outside but that are still very important.

SHOP:

Blue Beret || Boots || Similar Boots || Skirt (00-12) || Similar Skirt (S-XL) || Similar Skirt (14-24)
Blue Coat (0-14) || Blue Coat (00-12 petite) || Similar Coat (0-12) || Similar Coat (0X-3X)
Chenille Sweater (S-XXL) || Blue Tights

For January, our focus is CLEAN SLATE!
To be honest, my clean slate this month was kind of thrown off focus because I was sick for a whole week, which really conflicted with my creation plans. Just the same, the cool thing about working towards a clean slate is it’s never too late to start over, or too late to try something new! Even if you find yourself in the darkest of moments, you can get up, move on and take a step forward from where you are. It’s never too late to start fresh.

Although we only have one more week left of our “cream-colored” month & “clean-slate” focus, I will do my best to make the most of it for you. I’ll be sharing three ways to implement a clean slate into your world and to help make 2020 your best year yet starting today (the other two tips will follow on Wednesday and Friday).

CLEAN UP YOUR INNER CIRCLE
Our first step to a clean slate is to ensure that you’re surrounding yourself with people who enrich your life and don’t bring you down — both in real life and online. Take a moment to reevaluate your “surroundings” and to see that the people you invest time in are also giving something positive back to you in return. At a certain age (I would say 26+) you learn that you may have outgrown some of your friendships, or that some are simply one-sided and that’s okay. I’m sure there are people who have “let me go” (friendship wise) because they felt our relationship was one-sided. I certainly have had people in my life that I have somewhat cut ties with over the past few years for a variety of reasons. It’s nothing against the person; rather, it’s something I’ve done for myself and in order to stay positive. Today, I have two really great best friends and one best friend/sister that I consider my “inner circle.” These are the three people I talk to multiple times a week; the three people who will be standing with me at my wedding; the three people I would stop everything for and fly across the country for in a second if they needed me. But it is unrealistic to be that for everyone. For me, I think focusing on giving your all to a few select people creates a more valuable relationship than trying to spread yourself thin across 10 or 20 people. If your “inner circle” is too big it prevents you from really being there in a meaningful way for each of them and it leaves little to no time for you. Ultimately, you have to put yourself first because no one else will.

So step one, clean up your friendships! Here’s how:
Make a physical list of the most important people to you and make sure that they’re giving as much to you as you are to them. It doesn’t have to be “apples-to-apples” as in any friendship there is give-and-take. But ultimately, take a hard look and make certain that overall your relationship goes both ways. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t mean your friendship has to end. However, knowing that a relationship is one-sided can be insightful and help you (and your friend) in moving forward. Once you have your core group, send them a note, text, give them a call and tell them how much you appreciate their relationship. I’ll be doing this for my friends this week. With Valentine’s Day coming up, this is a great way to show your friends that you care! This action is just as much for you as it is for them; it will not only make your friends feel good, but will also help cement that relationship between the two in a way that’s outside of your mind. It’s essentially like the throw-back friendship bracelets from childhood, but this time it’s for adults! And if you’ve had a friend for a long time, it doesn’t hurt to remind them that they’re important and that you value them.

Okay, your friendship list is fresh and “sparkly-filled” with two-sided relationships that inspire and uplift you! Check! Now what?

CLEAN UP YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE:
You probably spend just as much time online and with social media as you do with real people connecting IRL. That’s scary right!? So what’s the point in cleaning up your relationships if you don’t do the same online? Make sure the people you follow make you happy, period! This goes for people you know personally and people you don’t. Since unfollowing someone can be hurtful at the least, and even harmful sometimes to someone’s mental health, I suggest using the mute button instead! If looking at an account makes you feel insecure, unhappy, or just down in anyway consider muting the account! I would write down the account names first because maybe in a few months you can revisit and see if something has changed. In the meantime, muting that account will prevent you from seeing their posts and pulling you down. On instagram you can mute someone’s stories, feed posts and both.

So you’ve muted the people who don’t make you happy, what about the accounts that do? Here’s an idea:
Go through your feed. Maybe spend more time than you usually would on instagram and don’t just kindly scroll — actually LOOK at the posts and go to those accounts. See what makes you happy about those pages. For me, most people enjoy the colors and positivity my account tries to present. But maybe you love a family account that shows amazing travel photos (like @thebucketlistfamily) or you’re really into an art account that makes mental health approachable (I love @positivleypresent). Figuring out WHAT accounts make you the most happy and identifying them will help ensure that you see more of them! After you’ve identified five or six accounts, write them down and engage on their page. Leave them some comments, “like” a few posts and maybe even send them a DM telling them why you like their page (it will mean a ton to them, and feel good for you too). Engaging on their page and letting them know what you like and what you want to see more of will ensure that you’ll see more from them that interests you. And, will hopefully make your online experience a more happy and positive one!

So now you have your tasks!
1 – identify your inner circle
2 – tell those people how important they are
3 – unfollow people online who hinder your happiness
4 – identify those online who make you smile, engage & even tell them so you see more of that in your feed!

What do we think? Can we do it!!! Tune in again on Wednesday for another way to help clean your slate. Until then, shine on cuties!!

This action is just as much for you as it is for them;it will not only make your friendsfeel good, but will also help cement your relationship, letting them know how much they mean to you and that they are in your “inner circle.” It’s essentially like the throw-back friendship bracelets from childhood, but this time it’s for adults! And if you’ve had a friend for a long time, it doesn’t hurt to remind themthat they’re important and that you value them.

SHOP THE LOOK: